Ego, the feeling of I am great and none other is equal to me can make us
act and speak in the most irrational manner. Ego destroys rationality and
logic. It destroys our balance in thoughts and action. We have the compulsive
need to prove that we are different and better than all others around us. We
issue challenges by which we go out of our way to prove our statements. When we
are victorious, our ego is fortified and this makes us feel better. We also
enjoy annihilating the ego of others as it makes us feel better and taller than
others. Ego is the cause of pain and break in relationships. It is the cause of
downfall of homes and society. It is the root of upheavals in nations. It is
the cause of battles and wars. When we look back with a clear head and check
our past thoughts and actions, we wince at our own ego and stupidity. But our
stupidity is rarely seen or acknowledged by us, as ego will not permit us to
see the reality of our ignorance. Nor can we see how much damage we cause to
ourselves and our loved ones. We are only interested in seeing that our will is
established and the ego is the winner!
The tale below is a story of a farmer and his wife who played the game
of ego wrestling. It would be a familiar scenario to all of us as we play and
replay this wresting match many times in our lives. A farmer and his wife had
finished the day’s work and were resting at home after their dinner. As
darkness fell, the wind rose and the front door of their home was flung open.
Both the husband and wife were too tired to get up and close the door. The
husband ordered the wife and the wife demanded that the husband do it instead
of ordering her around. Words were exchanged. Tempers rose. Ego became inflated
as each demanded the other get up and close the door. Finally they decided to
settle the matter through a wager. The
one who talks first should close the door. Then they both went to sleep leaving
the front door open.
As the hours
passed and midnight came, a wild dog entered the house. He went into the
kitchen and upturned all the vessels and licked the vegetable and food kept
there. The dog created a racket which both the husband wife heard. But none
spoke a word or got up from the bed. Their ego would not permit them to speak
first.
In the morning, the kitchen was in a mess and there was no food which was clean
and untouched by the wild dog. So the wife went out without speaking to a
nearby mill to get some flour to make breakfast. In the meantime, the
barber of the village came on his rounds. He entered the farmer’s home as the
door was open. He offered to cut his hair. The farmer did not reply. So the
barber proceeded to cut his hair. He asked the farmer if he liked the hair cut.
There was no response. This irritated the barber. So he shaved off all the hair
and made the farmer bald. Still there was no response from the farmer. The
barber cut off the left side of his moustache. No words still from the farmer.
Then he shaved off the right side of his beard. Still there was silence from
the farmer. The barber picked up some soot and rubbed it over the farmer’s
face. Still the farmer kept his mouth
shut. The barber left the house saying that the farmer had become mad.
The farmer’s wife entered the house then. She was horrified to see the
strange and ugly appearance of the farmer. She cried out: O husband, what happened to you? The farmer
opened his mouth and said: You spoke first. Go now and close the door!
Like the farmer and his wife, we permit endless loss to happen to us in
relationships, goodwill, property etc but we do not give up our ego. If we do
not give up our ego, it is not possible to experience the vast and sweet love
of God and merge with the Light. Regular practice of SitaRam mantra, meditation
and the teachings of the Guru help us to overcome our ego. Let us follow our practices sincerely and overcome our
ego. Let us speak out first and go and
close the door!
